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  #1  
Old 09-27-2010, 07:27 PM
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My Nana

I'm sitting here listening to christmas radio, Silent Night and I realize that was one of my Nana's favorite songs. I lost my Nana(my best friend, my second mom, and partner in crime) 3 months ago. I am still devastated and still have a hard time comprehending this. At 33 years old I should probably be handling this better but it is so hard especially thinking of Christmas, It was both of our favorite time of year. I guess I'm just wondering how others have coped with losing a loved one and celebrating your first birthday and christmas without them. Thanks for listening.
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Old 09-27-2010, 07:48 PM
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holly

Originally Posted by ChristmasSpirit76 View Post
I'm sitting here listening to christmas radio, Silent Night and I realize that was one of my Nana's favorite songs. I lost my Nana(my best friend, my second mom, and partner in crime) 3 months ago. I am still devastated and still have a hard time comprehending this. At 33 years old I should probably be handling this better but it is so hard especially thinking of Christmas, It was both of our favorite time of year. I guess I'm just wondering how others have coped with losing a loved one and celebrating your first birthday and christmas without them. Thanks for listening.
Hi ChristmasSpirit76, first let me tell you how sorry I am for your loss. Your Nana obviously meant a lot to you so don't be hard on yourself for not "handling it better." There is no time line when we lose someone but 3 months is a very short time when someone passes. We never get over it, just learn to live with it, at least that is the way I have always felt. Christmas inevitably brings back feelings and memories we may have forgotten. I lost my first husband 18 years ago in November. I was just 38. We had no children, it was just us and he too was my best friend and partner in crime. Though husband and wife are different from grandma and granddaughter, it is still a close bond. David and I as I mentioned were BEST FRIENDS. There is no tried and true rule. You just take one day at a time and that is all you can do. If you don't feel like celebrating, then scale back. If you do feel like celebrating, do. I am sure your Nana would probably like you to ! Don't feel guilty for having happy feelings. I have learned grief is an up and down process and one that just takes time. We do not forget those we love. We just learn to keep them in our hearts rather than the "visible" world. I truly believe they are still with us, we just can't see them here ! Perhaps you could start a blog here on the MMC site. Expressing our feelings at times of stress and grief helps immensely. I have a blog and I express my feelings in it and very often it is about the family I have lost and believe it or not, it does help. It is your blog and nobody is going to criticize what you write so don't worry about just "letting loose" when you write. I hope you will feel better soon. I have been there and I know what you are going through.

Take care now, okay ?? And if you want to PM me, I will be more than happy to talk to you whenever you need it if I can help.

Blessings.
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Old 09-27-2010, 07:53 PM
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God Bless you, Thank you so much for the kind and nurturing words. I like the idea of a blog so I am going to try and do that. I can't imagine what you went through losing someone so close to the holidays. I believe that they are with us too. I'm glad to know what I am feeling is normal.
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Old 09-27-2010, 08:01 PM
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@caninemom3...these are beautiful and inspiring thoughts to share with our friend who has recently lost her beloved nana.
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Old 09-27-2010, 08:08 PM
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I am older than you...and I just lost my 81 year old father today to a 10 year struggle with bladder and blood cancer....I feel your pain....I wish I could offer some words of wisdom....but as I sit here feeling like a child myself...who has been robbed of everything they ever loved....I have none....all I can say is that they tell me....it does get better...I hope and pray that is true....hugs to you my friend....
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Old 09-27-2010, 08:14 PM
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I am so sorry, There are no words I can offer you that will bring comfort to you at this time. You are in my thoughts and prayers. Hugs to you
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Old 09-27-2010, 08:34 PM
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So sorry to hear about your loss ChristmasSpirit and RavenHardt.

I lost my grandma 7 years ago and I go through those moments of missing her badly. I feel for you.

I also lost my very best friend of 20 years less than a year ago. That has been very difficult for me as well.

I think Caninemom said it best.
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Old 09-27-2010, 08:50 PM
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Sounds like you have some beautiful memories!!
I'm so so sorry. I know how bad it hurts to lose someone you love. (((hugs)))
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  #9  
Old 09-27-2010, 09:44 PM
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holly

Originally Posted by RavenHardt View Post
I am older than you...and I just lost my 81 year old father today to a 10 year struggle with bladder and blood cancer....I feel your pain....I wish I could offer some words of wisdom....but as I sit here feeling like a child myself...who has been robbed of everything they ever loved....I have none....all I can say is that they tell me....it does get better...I hope and pray that is true....hugs to you my friend....

RavenHardt....

Your Christmas Family is here for you as well as for ChristmasSpirit76. The feelings of abandonment and loss and confusion especially coming all at once are indeed overwhelming. It will/you will feel better. I pray that your pain right now will be replaced with happier remembrances of times past. Big (((((HUGS))))) To you as well as our friend ChristmasSpirit and blessings to you as well.
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  #10  
Old 09-28-2010, 01:48 AM
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caninemom said it best. take a day at a time. cry if you feel like crying, smile if you feel like smiling....even yell if you feel like yelling. there is no rule on how long it should take to get over something as painfull as the death of a loved one....I am 29 and the closest person I have lost is my great-grandmother in 1989...I was devasteted and even now when I am at her grave my eyes get teary when I tell her good bye and that I love her dearly.

you two will learn to live with your loss. your nana and your father will watch u from above now and be your guardian angels....don´t be hard on yourselves

god bless you
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