Entries by Ed Zachary

Biblical Proof of Santa Claus

The Bible says that Santa exists. This startling revelation comes to us at the North Pole in the form of a letter from a scientist, Dr. Jasper Bumgartner. Here is the full text of what he wrote: Dear Sirs, In the interest of scientific integrity I must admit to the recent discovery of evidence suggesting […]

Catching Santa: Ain’t Gonna Happen

When it comes to Santa simple logic just escapes people. For example, people think Santa keeps a list of kids who are “naughty” and kids who are “nice”. That story has been around for years. It ain’t true. We’ve told you that many times. And yet the story persists. It just is not logical. Nearly […]

It Ain’t About a Bird

Santa gets to see every letter sent to the North Pole eventually. But he has a lot of help in answering the thousands of letters that he receives each week. He’d love to answer each one personally, but he just can’t. And, in many of the letters, the things people ask can clearly be answered […]

Playing Head Games with Santa

Santa knows when you are sleeping. He knows when you’re awake. Pretty scary, huh? But what’s the big deal? A really good cat burglar can know the same thing about you. What’s worse is that he knows if you’ve been bad or good. Think about that: he knows. The very thought kind of gives me […]

Santa Everywhere

It is the question that just won’t go away: How does Santa get around the world in one night? I’ve never been one to understand how kids can ask this question. After all, Santa never fails to appear. I’ve lived through more Christmases than almost anyone and Santa has been there for every one of […]

Why the Big Guy is a Big Guy

We live in a politically correct world these days. That means we’re careful in how we say things. For whatever reason, Christmas is a target in the battles of political correctness. In some place, folks won’t say “Merry Christmas” — they’ll say “Happy Holidays” instead because they don’t want to be “offensive”. That’s silliness, of […]

In Honor of the Christmas Stocking

In this political season polls and focus groups seem to be all the rage. It is a trend that isn’t lost on us here at the North Pole. Before the season we get letters asking for all kinds of things. After the season, we get letters telling us how well we did. Based upon all […]