Ask ErnestNorth Pole

Can I get step-by-step instructions on how to wrap a present?

Dear Ernest,

Can Elf Wally give me step-by-step instructions on how to wrap a present? Include boxes and cylinders.

United States

Elf Wally is certainly the expert to ask this of. So I did. And this is what he said that you have to remember — just 25 easy steps to wrapping a present:

1. Eat a sugar cookie. This is important. It will limber your fingers for the complicated steps ahead.

2. Drink some eggnog. This has nothing to do with wrapping but it sure tastes good.

3. Picture in your mind what you want your present to look like.

4. Take a nap. The first three steps of this are exhausting.

5. Select some wrapping paper. Make sure it includes the colors red, green, white or gold.

6. Don’t cut the paper yet. Just pull out how much you think it will take to wrap it.

7. Put the paper down and pick up the tape. Look at the tape dispenser closely. See that sharp thingy? Don’t touch it. It hurts.

8. Tape the leading edge of the paper to one side of your gift.

9. How much paper did you pull out? Look at it again and pull out more, you didn’t pull out enough.

10. DO NOT CUT the paper. Not yet.

11. Pull the paper completely around your gift. Where ever you THINK you need to cut the paper…go one inch more than that.

12. Cut the paper.

13. Call your Mom over and see if she can help you. If the present is for her, ask her to close her eyes. Don’t worry, she can do it. She’s Mom.

14. Tape the cut edge of the paper to your present. Go ahead. Use a lot of tape. It’s okay.

15. Eat another sugar cookie. You must keep your energy level up.

16. Carefully fold the paper on one side. Make sharp creases in your folds. It won’t make the present look better but it will show who unwraps your present that you know what you are doing and no matter how bad it looks you did it on purpose.

17. Tape. Tape. Tape.

18. Turn the gift around and do the same thing on the other side.

19. Is there wrapping paper sticking out anywhere? Cut that stuff off. Then tape.

20. Get more eggnog.

21. Get some ribbon. Strategically place the ribbon on the rough spots of your package. Use lots of tape if necessary.

22. Have your Mom make a bow or buy one from a store.

23. Do NOT stick the bow on your head. This will make it so that you can’t stick it on your gift.

24. Set your present on a table.

25. Go outside. Look through the window. If your present looks good at a distance, you’re good to go.

Father of 7, Grandfather of 7, husband of 1. Freelance writer, Major League baseball geek, aspiring Family Historian.
  • C
  • December 7, 2014
You can just put the present on the paper and fold then, tape and cut of the sticking out part next take a bow string and tie it like you tie you shoe tape the bottom of the bow and stick it on the present not nothing else last, get some hot chocolate or egg nog I chose both and then get a cookie any kind you want! :)

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