Thanksgiving Jokes

Ervserver · Nov 17, 2006

How do you keep a turkey in suspense?
I'll tell you at Christmas.

Teacher: "Why do we have a Thanksgiving holiday?"
Student: "So we know when to start Christmas shopping!"

Why did they let the turkey join the band?
Because he had the drumsticks

A blonde was out of her home on Thanksgiving Day for the first time and was missing her family desperately. Finally, she decided to cook the turkey herself just like her mom. Later when she was narrating her experiences to her mother, she said, "Mother, it was so difficult to eat the turkey."

Her concerned mother asked, "Was it not cooked properly?"
She said, "How do I know? It wouldn't sit still!"

mrshamm · Nov 17, 2006

those are cute :grin:

Ervserver · Nov 17, 2006

A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked the stock boy, 'Do these turkeys get any bigger?'

The stock boy answered, 'No ma' am, they' re dead.'

sheepsnot · Nov 17, 2006

Now that last was was good. Sounds like something I'd say right before getting slapped.

sheepsnot · Nov 17, 2006

http://www.yahoo.americangreetings.com/display.pd?bfrom=1&prodnum=3081495&path=40689

Ervserver · Nov 17, 2006

just when I thought I've seen it all.....along comes the Donna Summer turkey

sheepsnot · Nov 17, 2006

I like it when she does the neck thing. You don't mess with a woman when she's doing the neck thing. That's just one step short of a full Linda Blair rotation.

Ervserver · Nov 20, 2006

I may show that to the relatives after a few rounds of eggnogs

Christy Carol · Nov 20, 2006

A friend of mine sent me that card last year. I played it for everyone!!!

Ali · Apr 13, 2007

Why does a Pilgrim's pants always fall down?

Because the silly buggers wear their belt buckle on their hat!

What kind of music did the Pilgrims like?

Plymouth Rock! :thanks:

SnowMaiden1018 · Jul 19, 2007

Thats my daughters Favorite JOKE!!

Plymoth Rock! HA!! What a knee slapper! she says after everytime she tells it...she's 8 and after 3 years of tht joke it still cracks me up!!

MerrySouthernChristmas · Sep 23, 2007

Asked to write a composition entitled, "What I'm thankful for on Thanksgiving,"
little Timothy wrote, "I am thankful that I'm not a turkey."

If the Pilgrims were alive today, what would they be most famous for?
Their AGE

Can a turkey jump higher than the Empire State Building?
Yes - a building can't jump at all

What do you get when you cross a turkey with an octopus?
Enough drumsticks for Thanksgiving

How can you make a turkey float?
You need 2 scoops of ice cream, some root beer, and a turkey

Why did the Indian chief wear so many feathers?
To keep his wigwam